The small, plucky band of rebels known as meat eaters struck a mighty blow against the vegetarian forces that otherwise dominate our society so strongly... by forcing Joan Jett to move her (still happening) performance from one float to another at the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.

According to CNN, the move was prompted by a protest from a trade group representing ranchers in South Dakota, the state presenting the float Jett was originally scheduled to perform on. Apparently fearful that millions of us non-vegetarians were gonna change our minds and swear off Thanksgiving turkey forever after seeing Jett perform 'I Love Rock 'n' Roll' or songs from her new album 'Unvarnished' on TV, the group swung into action.

"When we learned that about Miss Jett, we were rightly concerned about her representing South Dakota and a state that is so heavily reliant on agriculture and livestock production to drive our economy," stated Jodie Anderson of the South Dakota Cattlemen's Association.

Jett is a supporter of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), an organization which opposes factory farms and ranches and promotes a vegetarian diet. Judging from her statement, she seems to be taking the news pretty well: "I've decided to switch from South Dakota to another float because people's political agendas were getting in the way of what should be a purely entertainment driven event. I will remain focused on entertaining the millions of people watching, who will be celebrating a great American tradition."

PETA Senior Vice President Dan Matthews mostly seems appreciative for the publicity, declaring that "thanks to South Dakota's reactionary ranchers, people across the country have learned why Joan Jett supports PETA."