March 9th 2021 is a pretty significant date for me, as that is the day I had reconstructive ankle surgery and a tendon transfer to correct an issue I was battling for years.  At times it feels like just yesterday, while at the same time feeling like a lifetime ago.

Happy 1 year anniversary to me.

I checked my mailbox yesterday and inside found an envelope from the hospital I had the surgery at.  Upon opening it and realizing it was in fact not a Happy Anniversary card celebrating all the fun we had in the hospital while having a major surgery in the middle of a global pandemic, I was kind of surprised with what was inside.

A bill, for $25, a year after the surgery, but that wasn't the only shocker.

V.Turco
V.Turco
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$40,000 worth of outlined charges ranging from the fee for the operating room, to the cost of the metal screws and anchors they put in my ankle, to pre-op testing for covid, and what's that, a chlamydia probe?

I definitely don't remember consenting to that kind of pre-op test.

Now let me rewind to last year and the days leading up to my surgery.  I had done a covid test the Saturday prior as per their procedures at the time, and they called on Sunday informing me that I was positive.

Impossible, I just had covid in November of 2020, so there was absolutely no way I had it again.

After speaking with a few doctors and learning that it could have been residual cells from my November case, I convinced them to let me test again, the day prior to the procedure. I drove to the hospital on March 8th where a nurse came to my car, had me roll down the window, swabbed me up into my brain cavity, and called me a few hours later to inform me that the results were indeed negative and the surgery was all set to go.

So now, a year later, I have received a bill for services from 3/8 with said covid swab, along with a flu test and something called a chlamydia pneumonia amp probe.  Keep in mind, this testing all happened in the parking lot outside of the ER entrance, while I was in my car, and I'm pretty sure THAT kind of test didn't happen.

After freaking out a little and sending the photo to the group chats for another 'only me' chuckle, I took it to my ol'pal google before I called the hospital to rip them apart.

According to healthychildren.org, 'the STD is caused by Chlamydia trachomatis, one species of Chlamydia bacteria. Another species, called Chlamydia (or Chlamydophila) pneumoniae, causes respiratory illnesses. These lung infections are spread in the same way as many other respiratory diseases.'

That certainly explains a lot, doesn't it?

Moral of the story, there are apparently multiple forms of said disease, and in fact, two very different ways to test for its presence in your body, and for that, this girl is quite thankful.

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