Hot Take: What’s Your BBQ Attendee or Host Role?

With Memorial Day Weekend  behind us, the 'unofficial' start of summer is here and that means one important thing, the beginning of barbecue season.  Now before you come at me saying you BBQ year round, even in the NY winter snow and freezing temps, i'm just speaking for the majority here as to when you begin hosting and or attending summer BBQs (I highly doubt you're inviting people over in February to sit outside and eat hot dogs and corn on the cob from the grill).

Hudson Valley BBQ Hosting: How Do You 'Cue?

I was raised in a family that was always inviting people over, so summer BBQs were standard at our house. My parents cooked to feed a minimum of 30 people even if there were five of us, so my approach to hosting is based on that.

Are you the host that....

• tells invited guests, you oh don't worry, you don't need to bring anything at all.
• invites people over, only providing the location and the grill and then have their guests take care of bringing the rest.
• does a survey ahead of time to find out if people are going to have a burger OR a piece of chicken, what if I wanted both?
• orders the BBQ from a restaurant or catering company and gets to enjoy the gathering without having to worry?

Hudson Valley'ers Attending BBQs: What Are You Bringing?

Now, when you attend a BBQ at someone's house, family, friends, neighbors, are you going with arms loaded, asking what you can contribute, grabbing booze on the way over? If not food or drink, do you bring a gift for the hosts? Growing up I always remember seeing my parents headed to BBQs with arms loaded; dessert, a bottle of wine, sometimes a salad or appetizer too.  My grandfather used to say that when you go to someone's house your arms should be so full (of food or things for the hosts), that you have to ring the doorbell with your elbows - he was a smart guy!

Are you grabbing the paper plates, grocery store cookies, or a bag of chips on your way over because you forgot you said you'd bring something?

But what if the hosts tell you not to bring anything at all, do you go empty handed?  In my world the answer to that is no, because I have this irrational fear that somehow my parents will find out that I didn't bring something and I'll get yelled at...yes I'm an adult, with a child of my own, and still scared of my parents.

Hudson Valley BBQ Etiquette - Where Do You Stand?

So, as we head into the season of regular BBQs, we're just trying to get an idea of where the Hudson Valley stands - no judgement - just some local research.  Weigh in here.