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10 signs you’re a terrible employee (and our own results)

employee on phones
Getty Images / Cleland Rimmer

The folks at Business Insider recently posted a list of 10 signs that make you a bad employee.  For fun, Robyn and I wanted to figure out how many of these signs we exhibited, and how bad of an employee each of us actually are.

Here’s our scorecard below.  Take the quiz for yourself… Just don’t let our boss know if you prove to be a better candidate for our jobs:

1 – You’re always late
Boris: No, I’ve never been late for a radio show in over 20 years.
Robyn: I hate being late. Off to a great start!

2 – You make a lot of excuses
Boris: Yes. But if you’re always right, there must be an excuse for things not going the way they’re supposed to. Trick question.
Robyn: Well, yes… but that’s only because… you got me.  Yes.

3 – You complain about unexpected assignments
Boris: Yup
Robyn: Yup

4 – You love to gossip
Boris: Robyn and I must both say yes, since we spend all morning ripping apart everyone we work while we play music.
Robyn: Uh huh.

5 – You’re convinced you’re the smartest person in the office
Boris: Yes, but does this count if you really are?
Robyn: Secretly yes, but no one knows that, so no.

6 – You don’t believe in your company’s mission or values
Boris: That was true up until our recent sale.  So far, our new corporate overlords seem to know what they’re doing, so it’s a no (for now).
Robyn: I don’t even know their mission or values. So no.

7 – You’re noticeably less productive than you’re coworkers
Boris: No, but only because that would be physically impossible. I work with Meat Sandwich.
Robyn: I’m the first one to admit yes.

8 – Your colleagues clearly don’t enjoy working with you.
Boris: Clearly.
Robyn: That is untrue. (Boris confirms, it is untrue)

9 – You find yourself regularly apologizing to clients, or your bosses have to on your behalf.
Boris: It’s been known to happen.
Robyn: Only because I happened to be on the air with Boris, guilty by association.  Half point.

10 – You can’t take “no” for an answer.
Boris: And that’s a bad thing?
Robyn: I hear “no” all day long.

The Results? We’re both bad employees.  Surprisingly, I’m much worse than Robyn scoring 8 out of 10 to Robyn’s 4.5.  However, the fact that Meat Sandwich was too lazy to even answer the questions means that he’s the worst employee of all.

Luckily, we don’t have real jobs, so none of this really even matters.

How did you do?  And do you think answering yes to these questions really means you’re a terrible employee?

 

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